Author LiveInspiredwithNina

Author LiveInspiredwithNina

The Value of Mothering

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” Be willing to be your own internalized mother or father, capable of the specific nurturing you still need. Be an attentive parent to your inner child.” Nina Sidell, M.A.

As a child, we are given the caregivers that we inherit. The variation of mothers, fathers, grandparents, foster and adoptive parents raising children spans the globe. In honor of Mother’s Day, in specific, this blog article is written. Mothers worldwide deserve our place in the conversation.

As children experience childhood, they need a safe and consistent nurturing figure with whom they feel loved, protected, respected, and well-modeled. Often a mother fits this description. In today’s world, we have so many configurations of parenthood adding to the primary mother, that is a modern reality.

If you want to increase your appreciation for your mother and pass that on think about these ideas:

  • Mom’s learn how to mother from their mothers.
  • A Mother is the first woman and teacher in their child’s life.
  • All Mother’s do the best they can with the skills and awareness they have at the time.
  • Mother’s teach about safety, security, and the freedom to explore.
  • A Mother is a child’s first love object and attachment figure.
  • A Mother is a child’s first playground.
  • Mother’s love, accept,and see their child’s brilliance and uniqueness.
  • Mother’s cherish their babies, even when they are all grown up.
  • Mother’s are invested in their children’s happiness and well-being for a lifetime.
  • Mother’s give of themselves without being asked or thanked, just for the desire to give to their child.
  • All Mother’s are the most powerful role model for their daughters.
  • All Mother’s are the most significant female role models for their sons.
  • With unconditional love and respect, a Mom and her child can continue to evolve.
  • The relationship between a Mother and her child lasts for a Lifetime; there’s endless love and growth potential.
  • You can be an inner parent to your inner child, seeking healing if you need to resolve trauma, conflict, or childhood wounds.
  • The gift of good Mothering effects children’s entire lives.
  • Mothering is at the heart of our society, if we would acknowledge and cherish it, instilling individual, family and social growth.

Happy, Healthy Mother’s Day to all Mom’s! Thank you for helping to create happy children, families, and conscious parenting practices that help build a happy and healthy society.

To learn more, get your copy of my Mom’s Choice Award-Winning book, “Parenting for Life”. Dr. Deepak Chopra says, “If you are interested in conscious parenting, this book is an excellent guide.” https://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Life-Nina-Sidell-M-A/dp/1506175589

Live Inspired! ®

Nina~ www.LiveInspiredwithNina.com

#parenting #consciousparenting #mothering #lifetimerelationship #child #family #love

 

The Gift of Good Co-Parenting

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” Being willing to consciously parent is an essential skill. Being willing to co-parent well is a gift.” Nina K. Sidell, M.A.

“Free yourself from antiquated ways, ineffective parenting styles and strategies or knee-jerk reactions by committing to parent with awareness. By making a conscious commitment to living with an open mind and heart, you free yourself from old habitual patterns, belief systems, and unconscious, inappropriate, or defensive responses. Try an expanded view and version of the old or ineffective style and strategies. Learn to do what works and release what does not. With awareness, you build acceptance and strength to deal with your child and his (or her) needs, both for now and for the future. Sometimes, that is much easier said than done. Let illusions of reality- outmoded ways of thinking, responding, and living that do not support your or your family go.” Parenting for Life, Nina K. Sidell, 2015.

When you marry or cohabitate and then bring a child into the world, the future success of your initial relationship is unknown to you. Hopefully, the relationship is sustained over time and the experience of being together with children grows in every way. Couples connect based on feelings of love, need, attraction, shared values or goals, and romantic commitments.

Whether you remain an in-tact unit or become single parents, you are responsible to keep the welfare of your children top of mind and heart at every turn.

As you help your children cope through the difficulty and pain, and as you all begin to heal, so will your co-parenting. The gift of growth and healing is present for the taking.

Here Are Some Tips to Consciously Co-Parent Well:

  • Whether you are coupled/married or divorced, remember that the goal is to provide consistent love, safety, protection, guidance, and support for your children.
  • Maintain healthy boundaries by keeping adult issues and conflicts away from your children. Your children get only one childhood and it’s significant for their lifetime.
  • Take ownership if you over-share adult issues and conflicts in front of your children. Apologize and self-correct so to not repeat the behavior.
  • Be responsible for how you deal with your co-parent, especially in front of your children so that you model self-control and respectful behavior.
  • Work on resolving your individual and marital issues with a trusted therapist and/or parenting coach. Find a safe place to “dump”, be heard, and strategize.
  • Work with a therapist and/or parenting coach to create a workable Parenting Plan- that covers the basics and specifics of childcare for your family.
  • Agree to communicate with your ex in an agreed upon manner (privately) about children’s needs, schedules, changes as helpers in co-raising your children.
  • Determine who is responsible for what as the parental responsibilities and goals are determined for the best interest of your children.
  • Build-in flexibility and good problem-solving skills when unexpected scheduling, interpersonal issues, and emergencies arise.
  • Encourage that your children have a positive relationship with the other parent.
  • Have your children “catch you” saying positive things about themselves and the other parent.
  • Healthy boundaries help you and your ex move on in your own personal/dating lives.
  • Create clear boundaries around who are the safe caregivers for your children and who are not.
  • Be sure to discuss safe adults with your children. Encourage and invite open communication about their needs, wishes, and feelings with active listening.
  • Schedule time for fun. Reinforce the importance of fun bonding time with your children and both parents.
  • Take good care of yourself. When you feel good, you are a better parent and co-parent.

Feel free to reach out for a Free Phone Consultation. Call: 215-628-0282 or Email: Nina@LiveInspiredwithNina.com I am here to help.

Inspiring Insights for Well-Being.

Live Inspired! ® Nina~

#AwardWinningParentingBook #conflict #ConsciousParenting #divorce #singleparenting #parenting #coparenting #parentingbook #parentingplan #selfcare

How Therapy Helps

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“Good psychotherapy keeps clients safe, feeling free to be themselves while risking: expanding awareness and healing that is carried forward”. Nina K. Sidell, M.A.

When you take the step to consult with a psychotherapist, there are many things for you to consider. If you are doing this for yourself, your relationship, your family, or the courts you will gain the most going into it with some important knowledge. In my private practice experience spanning over thirty years, I have taught my clients to empower themselves when selecting me in a consultation phone call or someone else to work with. Psychotherapy can help you to understand and resolve acute or chronic issues and patterns as time unfolds.

Here is what to look for:

  1. Interview therapists who specialize in what you need help with. You can also seek general professional support and explore areas together.
  2. The initial consultation or meeting establishes if there is a safety and comfortable connection and the sense that the clinician can skillfully help you.
  3. Choose a clinician who welcomes questions, self-expression, and feedback so that you are actively part of the therapeutic process.
  4. Trust your intuition and feelings when choosing a private practice or psychotherapist. You will know who you feel most comfortable to work with.
  5. Take into consideration therapists who have been recommended by former clients, other therapists, credentialed sites like Psychology Today, family law attorneys and the courts.

Here is how therapy helps when done well:

  1. You are more self-aware, feel emotionally better, and think more clearly about your issues, your part in the problem and healing process/ solution.
  2. You have an improved mental attitude and emotional lightness once healing unfolds.
  3. Growth is second nature to you as learning, growing and healing become a part of your life’s story.
  4. You develop your self-honesty, resilience, and authenticity by courageously looking at yourself and your pain.
  5. Your relationships deepen or fall away, helping you continue to grow.
  6. You find love and empathy for your younger or current self and for those you love.
  7. Your inner strength and confidence, improved attitudes and behaviors improve.
  8. You have the experience of “doing your work”.
  9. Your old defense mechanisms and coping mechanisms evolve to better fit your life now.
  10. You integrate new ideas about yourself, your relationships, and the world into your view.

Reach out if you are looking for individual, couples or family therapy. I am here to help using Talk Therapy, Expressive Arts Therapies, CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy), Bioenergetics, Meditation, and Mindfulness. I am an insightful, experienced, empathetic, strength-based therapist who is, “gently confrontational” in my clinical approach. Email me at: Nina@LiveInspiredwithNina.comor call me at: 215-628-0282 to schedule your Free Phone Consultation.

Live Inspired! ® Nina~

http://www.LiveInspiredwithNina.com

#therapy #psychotherapy #depression #anxiety #mentalillness #parenting #consciousparenting #personaldevelopment #empowerment #family #familyissues

Choose Freedom!

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“When you trust and honor yourself, heal your wounds with self-compassion and mindfulness, you choose freedom.” Nina Sidell, M.A.

I for one, consciously choose my freedom and strength by directing myself and my life, my way. I enjoy the process of being a lifetime learner as I evolve, confidently honoring and empowering myself as life unfolds. I support my children, family, friends, clients, audiences, and readers to work on their personal development and empowerment as an extension of my interest in personal growth and development. I welcome feedback to enhance my personal and professional growth and development. I choose freedom to charter my own ship, not waiting or asking for validation or permission from others. I accept and support everyone to find their own unique way, including myself.

How do you live your life, moment-by-moment and over time?

Sometimes we are raised to distrust ourselves and question our instincts, needs or feelings. In many families, the message can be that action follows feedback, permission or validation from outside sources. Life then changes from the potentiality of liberating choices, but a list of to-do’s that feel like entrapment without meaning.                                                                                       .

Choose Wisely:

  • Remember that you are in charge of your life, essentially you design your life and sense of personal freedom.
  • Your powers of observation, self-awareness, and your willingness to do your work make all the difference.
  • See your life choices as individual to you; do not wait for others or compare yourself to others. Folks grow at their own pace.
  • Explore what personal freedom means to you and look at ways to create or expand upon it in your life.
  • Seek out help and support if you need to explore your patterns or want to make better choices in your life and get stuck alone.
  • Freedom and responsibility go hand in hand to live a life of balance.
  • Choosing personal freedom improves and enriches your life in big and little ways.
  • Other people may not align with your path of development and personal empowerment.
  • Let go of choices that are misguided, hurt yourself or others.
  • Always consider what do you have to gain and give up in your choices.

Add to this list and see what you come up with that defines and helps you to create an empowered life. I am here to help if you want to work with me in therapy or life coaching. Choose wisely how you want to live your personal and professional life experience. You really do have a choice.

Live Inspired! ®

Inspiring Insights for Well-Being.

Nina~ www.LiveInspiredwithNina.com

#Freedom #Choice #Development #PersonalEmpowerment #PersonalFreedom #Mindfulness #Awareness #Therapy #LifeCoaching #Psychotherapy

 

 

 

 

 

Who’s Listening?

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” Feeling truly heard by another person is deeply satisfying, necessary, and sometimes feels like a treat more than a regular occurrence.” Nina K. Sidell, “Parenting for Life”

Do you feel heard when you talk and share with others? Are you a good listener? How often do you feel truly listened to with your friends, family and colleagues? What acknowledgements are demonstrated to you when you feel that you are being heard? After all, communication is designed for both people in a discourse to feel seen, heard, and understood as a basic psychological human need. When we forget that everyone has something to say, we are more present and truly hearing both sides. Listening well and feeling heard assist in resolving conflict and bring people together. Even if those ‘agree to disagree’, or have no consensus, there is always room for a healthy discussion.

Here are some Active Listening Tips to practice and ask of others:

The Listener:

  1. Relax enough to be available to hear someone else and respect their point of view.
  2. Be present when listening by putting own agenda and reactions aside.
  3. Take turns to confirm what was said.
  4. Ask if what you heard is what the speaker said (versus interpretation).
  5. The listener responds to what the speaker says instead of sharing, comparing, or reacting.
  6. The listener talks after the speaker does in a shared dialogue.
  7. Respond rather than react.
  8. Thank the speaker for sharing.

The Speaker:

  1.  Set aside a good time to talk for both parties where there are no distractions.
  2. Be clear and direct and stay on topic.
  3. Make “I” Statements when expressing feelings or opinions to make the sent message easier to digest.
  4. The purpose of sharing is for the speaker is to be heard clearly.
  5. Blame, shame, name-calling, yelling and insults are not permitted when sharing.
  6. Learn how to self-correct in the moment if need be.
  7. Know that the goal is to be heard and not necessarily to be agreed with.
  8. Thank the listener for listening.

It is never too late to communicate well and to improve your skills and relationships. If I can be of help, please reach out to me whether you are struggling with personal empowerment or relationship issues at home or at work. Email me at: Nina@LiveInspiredwithNina.com. I am here to help. Live Inspired! ® Nina~

#listening #sharing #communication #relationships #conflictresolution #activelistening #parenting #consciousparenting #mindfulness #accountability #respect #personalempowerment #empowerment #development #leadership #worklifebalance